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Lil' Bratz Torch / Flashlight Review
Submitted by An Outdoor Idiots Team Member.
Features
It would be easy to dismiss this torch as being nothing more than a child's toy, but don't let first impressions fool you. The more we investigated it, the more we were impressed with its array of high tech features. This is a serious bit of kit. Here are some of the more noteworthy innovations we discovered:Tactical ThumbswitchTM
What, at first glance, appears to be a mere "switch" turns out to be far more than just that. It is, in fact, a Tactical ThumbswitchTM. Yes, tactical: that meaningless buzzword that has been slowly osmosing its way into the world of outdoor equipment over the last few years. Usually, its use causes us either alarm or despair. At last, though, we have found a device which warrants the use of the word. Here it is:
It is a sliding switch. You slide it towards the head to power up the torch. We say "power up", because this is not a torch which one merely "turns on". To power the torch down, you slide the switch away from the head. And the switch is silent. Deadly silent. Tactical silent. The torch is therefore suitable for hunting biscuits in the middle of the night, with no fear of the biscuits becoming alerted to your presence.
Note, too, the use of star symbols. This is clearly an allusion to the fact that Raccoon City's S.T.A.R.S. team could benefit from this torch, if only they chose to.
WristsafeTM Break-Away Lanyard Ring
What appears to be a pointless bit of decoration at the base of the torch...
...turns out to be a ring for attaching a wrist lanyard to:
It is important to take advantage of this feature and attach the torch securely to your wrist with a lanyard. Everybody knows that hunting biscuits can quickly become hectic and chaotic, and there is nothing worse than dropping your torch whilst being outwitted by a Custard Cream in the middle of the night.
The downside with most torch lanyards is that should the torch become caught on or in something solid, while, at the same time, you fall clumsily to the floor with all your weight, it is inevitable that your hand will become severed and be a right royal pain to sew back on. But this ingenious WristsafeTM Break-Away Lanyard Ring solves all that. Rest assured, in such scenarios, the ring will snap before your hand becomes completely severed, thereby giving you a fighting chance of returning to base with your dignity, and some of your hand, intact.
Directional Lighting System (DLS)TM
Another important safety feature is the built-in Directional Lighting SystemTM. Light can be a force to reckon with, and a wild, reckless one at that. It is not the kind of thing which one can just allow to roam freely. Thankfully the designers were very mindful of this fact, and so they have fitted the unit with a DLSTM system. Here it is, close up:
The system is far too complex for us to either understand or explain, however it is the result that counts. The result is that, provided the operator stands squarely behind the torch and holds it at arm's length, with the head pointing directly away from them, they should be relatively safe when they power the torch up. The DLSTM ensures the light flows in the direction indicated:
Phew!
Illumi-WarningTM Bezel
It's all well and good to be able to control the direction of the light, but what if, shortly after bagging your intended biscuit, you absent-mindedly put the torch down, face-down, without first powering it down? Well, when you come to picking it back up, you could inadvertently scar somebody for life, or melt your own eyes or somebody else's, or, well, all manner of things. It just doesn't bear thinking about. But thankfully, the designers have thought of that scenario, too. Some of the light - though not a dangerous quantity - is allowed to leak through a clever red ring at the head of the torch...
... so if the torch is powered up, you should always know about it, no matter what. Ingenious.
AqualoaderTM Body
The final feature of note is the AqualoaderTM Body. With a great many modern torches, if you dunk them in water, even for a very long time, you will have nothing to show for your efforts. You might as well not have bothered. This is often due to careless bits of rubber that have been left over from the manufacturing process. The bits of rubber act as seals, blocking the entry of water.Thankfully, with this torch, the manufacturer has been careful to tidy up after themselves. All excess rubber has been removed, and the torch arrives in clean, pristine condition, with no blockages to hinder the ingress of water. We put this to the test by submerging the body in water for a full minute. By pouring the resulting contents of the torch into a container, we estimate it has a capacity of about 11 cubic centimetres. That's not enough to make a satisfying cup of tea, but it's better than most torches these days. If you wish to use the torch as a vessel in this way, we have discovered that by first removing the batteries, the capacity can be maximised.
Page 3 of 5 Previous Next [Top of Page]
Page 1: Background
Page 2: Review: Packaging; Build & Appearance; Extras
Page 3: Review: Features
Page 4: Review: Output; The Innards Explored; Conclusion
Page 5: Appendix: Hullabaloo
Page 2: Review: Packaging; Build & Appearance; Extras
Page 3: Review: Features
Page 4: Review: Output; The Innards Explored; Conclusion
Page 5: Appendix: Hullabaloo
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