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The TattyBattyNatty Meter

Outdoor Idiots.com, in its tireless quest to name and shame shoddy and/or pointless outdoor "equipment", introduces the TattyBattyNattyTM Meter.

From time to time, we come across these equipment outrages ourselves, or our allies in this cause (i.e. you, and more often than not, the TatMaster) will alert us to them. We will investigate the offending items with our world-renowned journalistic integrity (i.e. we may or may not bother to even look at the item first-hand), then deliver our verdict using the TattyBattyNatty Meter.

The product on trial can be Tatty, Batty, Natty or somewhere in between. There are 5 positions that the needle of the TattyBattyNatty Meter can point to. Here are those positions, together with exciting explanations:

Tatty
Tatty: The item deserves to be thrown in the bin. No messing about.





Tatty-Batty
Tatty-Batty: The item might just have some redeeming, if pointless, features.





Batty
Batty: The item is an inexplicable conversation piece.





Batty-Natty
Batty-Natty: The item represents the pinnacle of crazed genius.





Natty
Natty: The item, boringly, makes perfect sense.



So clearly the most shameful score an item can achieve is "Tatty". But which is the best result? Natty, or Batty-Natty? We don't know. But Batty-Natty does indicate a certain sense of style.











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